We Haven't Forgotten Your Promise


          We  at  Worldwide  Cruise  Lines  didn't forget  that  a  lot  of
          entertainers had promised to leave  the country if George W. Bush
          became President. With that in mind,  we have a special offer for
          those who  want  to keep  their  promise! Attention:  Would  Alec
          Baldwin,  Rosie  O'Donnell,  Cher, Phil  Donahue,  David  Gephin,
          Barbara Streisand, Pierre Salinger, and  anyone else who made the
          promise, please report to Florida  for the sailing of the funship
          cruise, Elation, which has been  commissioned to take you to your
          new vacation  homes. The  Florida Supreme  Court  will sponsor  a
          Farewell Parade  in your honor  through Palm Beach,  Broward, and
          Miami-Dade  counties  prior to  your cruise.  Please pack  for an
          extended stay...at least four years. Your captain  is to be  Bill
          Clinton and your cruise director will be Al Gore. Monica Lewinsky
          will  be your  recreation director  and Ted  Kennedy will  act as
          lifeguard  and supervise swimming instruction. He will also teach
          a course in emergency procedures. Your spiritual  advisor will be
          the Rev.  Jesse Jackson. If  you have any questions  about making
          arrangements  for  your  homes, friends  and  loved  ones, please
          direct your  comments to Senator  Clinton. Her village  can raise
          your children while  you're  gone,  and she  can watch  over  all
          your money and furnishings until you return.