Canned Again


               A couple  weeks ago, I had to provide  cream and sugar for a
          thing we had at  work. I don't use cream or sugar  for coffee  or
          anything,  so I didn't have any. A co-worker picked up some sugar
          cubes and half-and-half at the store. I had a  container of half-
          and-half left.  I don't usually use  that, so I thought  I'd make
          something to use it with. So I picked up a package of tuna helper
          at the store  which called for milk  and decided I would  use the
          half-and-half.  Last  Saturday  night I  had  already  had dinner
          (luckily) but the half-and-half date was running out so I thought
          I'd make  my  dish.  I mixed it  all up and  went for the  can of
          tuna. Opened it. Put it in. Hum,  didn't quite smell like tuna or
          feel like  tuna. It had  to be broken up. But it had  to be tuna.
          That was the only  thing like it that was in that  place. So into
          the  microwave it went.  Well, it still bothered me that what was
          in there  was a  non-tuna-like substance.  I  thought about  what
          could  that be  in   there.  Well, my  dearly beloved,  departed,
          deceased kitty, before she  died, had to eat K/D food  because of
          her  failing kidneys. I fed it to  her dry, but I had purchased a
          couple of  cans of K/D to try. She turned  up her nose at it, and
          the  can which  had been opened  that she didn't  eat was history
          long ago, but uh, this one was about to be history in my  dinner.
          I jerked the stuff out of the microwave and fed it to the garbage
          disposal.  Mind you, the  can of stuff  was more  expensive  than
          tuna. And my house mate keeps referring to whether I'll be buying
          "cat food helper" at the store, and about my new   "cat chatorey"
          recipe.   I  do wonder  what that  tuna helper would  have tasted
          like, but not with the said meat inserted in it! 

          Ann McCay