Look Before You Leap And Leak


          This week my  daughter gave my wife  a baby kitten as  a present.
          Just what we  need; another animal.   Anyhow, the  little cat  is
          pretty  cute, I must admit,  and I have  enjoyed his company this
          week.  I want to tell you something the little cat  did, however,
          but it won't  be easy to  explain.  perhaps  this falls into  the
          category of, it could only happen to a blind person, but you will
          have to  judge for  yourself.  I'm  sure this  could happen  to a
          sighted person, too, but here goes.  For the first two nights, we
          shut the little kitten in the bathroom where the cat box is.  The
          second night, I awakened in the middle of the night.  At  first I
          thought of rolling  over and waiting for a couple  of more hours,
          since that's when  I'd be getting up anyhow, and peeing then.  At
          my advanced  age, however, waiting  an extra couple of  hours can
          make a big  difference, so I decided  to get up and  get it over.
          Then, upon shutting  the alarm off at about 5:45, I wouldn't have
          to empty my  bladder.  I got  up and stumbled into  the bathroom,
          it's about  3:30 in  the morning,  and I  began to  take care  of
          relieving my bladder  of the pressure which built  up over night.
          The little  cat is tickled pink that somebody  had come in to see
          him and  so he  is milling  around down  by my  feet, mewing  and
          rubbing up  against my bare ankle.  Well, as I was minding my own
          business,  feeling  the  pressure  draining away  as  it  were, I
          thought to myself, I hope that little  cat doesn't try to jump up
          on  the toilet, since the lid is  up and all, and then I decided,
          naw, he wouldn't do such a thing.  At  this same time, the little
          cat  decided he wanted to  jump up on the toilet.   Well, I heard
          this big  splash and immediately  some pretty frantic mewing.   I
          stopped what I was doing, you have to use your imagination here a
          little, and  pulled the  cat out of  the miniature  swimming pool
          into which  he'd  just attempted  the  swan dive.    Yes, he  was
          soaked.   I dropped him on the floor,  and once I'd finished what
          I'd originally come  in to do, went  back to bed.   As I  crawled
          beneath the  sheets, I awakened my  wife by calling her  name and
          told her,  you best go check on your  little cat in the bathroom.
          She came to life right away and said, why, what happened.  I told
          her.  She said, he didn't.   I said, he did to and  you better go
          dry him off because he's very wet.  She continued to accuse me of
          making the whole thing  up, something I have been known  to do in
          the past, but  I continued to  insist it was  a true story.   She
          finally  rolled out  of  bed and  when she  came back  about five
          minutes later, I said, Well, was the little cat a little wet as I
          described.  She said yes,  he was soaked and she  confessed she'd
          dried him off.   I told  her that I doubted  he'd ever make  that
          mistake again.   Moral of  the story?   Look where  you leap  and
          leak.

          Phil Scovell